Some of you may have read my post from several months ago expressing my issues with pornography (http://cheekyguy.tumblr.com/post/4396010424/porn) and even though reading them back now, finding them slightly less articulate than I’d imagined I stand by them. In essence, I always have concern…
As always, well said.
westborobaptistchurchgangordie:jewishes:1felony:
God bless America
HI HATERS, HAVEN’T YOU DUMB MOTHER FUCKERS EVER HEARD OF TOMATO PIE? WHAT DO YOU THINK TOMATOS ARE? IT SURE LOOKS LIKE A VEGETABLE TO ME. BYE HATERS.
One more giant step in the war against obesity
Aren’t tomatoes a fruit? Or did congress change that too?
via marissa
Oh hey looks like someone else took a class with Jim Morris.
(and clearly they didn’t learn anything either, since they spelled basis wrong.)
“When I’m sad, I feel like there’s no cheering me up. I feel like I’ll never be happy again. But when I’m happy, I can’t even imagine being sad.”
Things I’ve Noticed
My horror movie intake increases significantly when my relationship is on it’s way out and/or I’ve just had a messy break up. I don’t know what this says about me as a person.
zombiezoologist asked: Can I be your fiend?
a fiend or a friend!? i misread that at first, could mean all the difference!
Friends With Benefits- I’m okay with this
“Crazy Eights” - My entire childhood is a lie, all of my high school friends were raised in an orphanage where people did crazy experiments on us to see if we could or couldn’t feel guilt, and now all of us are going to be haunted by the crazy evil ghost bitch of our friend that we accidentally suffocated in a trunk. And we’re all gonna die, cool.
Who needs to actually WATCH a horror movie, when reading the descriptions on Netflix Instant are so much more entertaining?
I should’ve known this all along since I sat through the better part of ThanksKilling, but seriously this is some classy shit.
I bring you some of my favorites.
THANKSKILLING, 2009
“While on their way home for Thanksgiving break, five college kids run afoul of a homicidal turkey that wants them dead. As the cursed bird hunts them down one by one, the survivors scramble to find a way to defeat the possessed creature. Will the bloodthirsty turkey make this their last Thanksgiving feast ever? Writer-director Jordan Downey’s holiday-themed horror spoof features an appearance by adult-film star Wanda Lust.”
As this is something I actually watched, I can also make you aware that the sex scene is the turkey having sex with a woman. And when she realizes it’s the turkey and not her boyfriend behind her, the turkey yells “You just got stuffed!” Bam.
ZOMBIE WOMEN OF SATAN, 2009
“After her sister is kidnapped by a bizarre cult, rock singer Skye Brannigan sets out to find her. The members of freaky burlesque troupe Flesharama become involved in the hunt, and soon they’re all attacked by a flock of gorgeous zombie women.”
Flesharama. That’s all you need to know.
TAINTLIGHT, 2009
“When lovely young Stella strikes up a romance with pale, brooding vampire Edgar, the couple must navigate the treacherous waters of human-undead love and fend off the amorous advances of a werewolf named Jack.”
I need to get my own Netflix account so when curiosity gets the better of me no one needs to think I’m watching this shit for legit.
JESUS CHRIST VAMPIRE HUNTER, 2001
“This indie film garnered awards on the festival circuit, including Slamdance, Zombiedance, the Fargo Film Festival and the Santa Cruz Film Festival. The far-out story has Jesus finally returning to Earth — but he must contend with a world under assault by a band of vampires. Mary Magnum and the god of Mexican wrestling, El Santos, help Jesus fight evil in this oddball horror-comedy.”
Okay this one might be going on my instant queue.
Watching “Crazy Eights”
and the scariest thing that’s happened yet is this guy kicked a garbage can and I was ignoring the movie and I jumped when the can fell over. Am I that desensitized to little girl ghosts ripping out peoples’ throats?
Confession
Sometimes, I get that “Through the Trees” song from Jennifer’s Body stuck in my head except I don’t know any words besides like, 6. And I haven’t seen it since I awkwardly watched it with my dad about a year ago.
